January 2011
3 posts
Sooooo, yeeeaahh, about that..
Once upon a time there was me. Fickle, all over the place big ol’ me. One day I started a tumblr about my life and getting it together. Since then its been all “this is awesome!” then it was all “eh, no mas” then I was like “no! I can do this!” and then I totally didn’t. Lamopotomus. So now I’m all like “get your ass back on that...
August 2010
7 posts
Death really gets in the way of life....
Well my grandpa passed away Monday night. He was 76 and in failing health. I was lucky enough to be the last person to see him so I am so greatful I was able to tell him I loved him one last time. So needless to say it has been an emotional week that has felt like an eternity. the funeral is today and I am both happy and sad to be over with it. He was the very last family member I had that...
BATMAN!!!
So..I spend too much damn time at my laptop. I need laptop rehabilitation. Here are the finer points of yesterday:
work = got through it, pondering second job but know myself enough it will over come me. Will wait to see if I can afford lily’s extra curriculars..if not.. resume goes out.
Mother/daughter out of town for the weekend. Beautiful timing for relaxing weekend before school...
ITSSS AAALLLLIIIIIIIIIVEE!!!!!!
And by “it” I mean me and by alive I mean…alive. haha. After a long rather self destructive vacation from life, I am back on bored. On ediets and pretty damn happy. As pointless and no good my little spurts of self destructivness are, one good thing comes of them from time to time. A bit of self awarness I suppose. I had tried ediets with great success as a teenager so I finally...
May 2010
6 posts
stress!
massive, mmaassssiive stress eating as of late due to the current combination of :
4 week biology course (everyday = 1 week…my brain is exploding!)
work (not enough I need and yet too much with school)
singe mom-dome
trying to sell car and title new car
plan/prepare/save for road trip in June
I’ve never been a big fast food person for several reasons. 1) The cost adds up...
blarg!
So despite my desire to get back on track it has yet to actually happen. I do have a frequent problem with doing the “I’ll eat all the bad food in the house first” thing. Problem is that my mother, who could care less about eating healthy, consistently brings in new unhealthy food. She often brings me “treats”, which really is meant to be nice but does have that...
What’s in store for June/July
...
kickassandtakenames replied to your post: I’m here…
I’m so glad you’re back, I was starting to get concerned and was trying to figure out how to contact you without coming off like a stalker. lol I think you’re on the right track about goal setting. Happy thoughts your way!
Kickass, this is a 100% solo and often lonely journey for me which frankly probably has something to do with...
I'm here...
I’m here and I’m ready. I’ve been self involved and distant from life for awhile now. This has translated to some epic weight gain in the last few months. In the name of accountability my official weigh in is:
258.6
I start summer school in exactly one week and fitting into the little desk will be a not so fun embarrassing experience, but I’ve lead myself here and now...
March 2010
25 posts
So after that whole job stuff being poorly timed with my hormones I haven’t seemed to be able to bounce back. I should be feeling back to me by now, but the funk has just been hanging around. I’ve felt consistantly anxious and bummed. I just bought a vehicle which I should feel excited about but all I feel is really distant from reality if that makes any sense. Gapping hole in my chest...
Nick Jr must be stopped
kristey:
avocadosalad:
avocadosalad:
Having lived with a three year old girl, I was subjected to children’s shows on a daily basis. Since most of these shows’ target audience is children ages 2-5, you’d think that these shows would be sweet and innocent, as well as educational. You’d be wrong, they are far from sweet and innocent.
What’s so terrible about these preschool shows you ask?...
Why hello PMS, I've been expecting you...
I am usually very on time with such bodily functions but this month it just never happened. I’ve spent most of the month just waiting for the mood swings to sneak up on me and I must say…it’s unnerving. That being said I spent all day yesterday wanting to cry and certain today would be better. Not much better. All I feel is sad, unmotivated and weepy. Dear PMS, you suck!
So...
I can pretty much say right now that today is gonna either be a way under calories day or a way over. I was exactly one day away from seven days on track…..
I went to orientation for my new job, after almost four hours there the owner checked my credit and let me know he would not be able to employ me. I couldn’t have been more caught off guard. Upon further inspection (he was nice...
I got a job!
I got a job! I got a job! I got a job hey hey hey hey! I’m overjoyed right now. I have been working nights and weekends part time for over three years. The truth is I hate working nights, I would so much rather get my work done and have my nights free. Not to mention I have learned to live off a very small amount of money, which has been ok, but after three years I just feel neglected. I...
So awhile ago I posted this...
“…also… this winter has been really brutal for me. I think some of it is clearly emotional but it is actually the coldest winter I’ve dealt with yet in MO. So on that note, I picked this (Biggest Loser Cardio Max DVD) up when I was at Target last night. Tried it out today, got through like six minutes before feeling like I was gonna die. I’ve got a long way to go.”
I finished the...
Three days in the green, can I get a “bitch what” !! <3
meep!
enoughfluff answered your question: Tired?
is that pedometer program on the new classic ipod? or just the new nanos? I need to check mine! It sounds awesome.
…I have no idea how to answer through tumblr so I’ll just do it here. Its on the new nano. I would imagine its on the classic too, I always thought the classic had all the stuff the nano did plus some? It’s seriously...
Tired?
So I went for a walk, it was awesome and totally craptastic all at once. Its all up hill and downhill which is just an ass kicking good time, but it really felt like abuse today. I think mostly because I have been so sedentary for so long that it was a bit of a push. I had to pee halfway through, then got a headache and overall it did not feel so good. However, when I got home I remembered why I...
2 tags
hmmm...
So Lily and I are gonna make a homemade pizza caterpillar tonight! I reeally want tonight to be in the green and pizza doesn’t really fit into that very easily so I have come up with a solution. I tried to use mapmyrun but that website is not user friendly! grr. Anyhow, the weather is amazing so Lily and I are gonna walk to the store. The trip there and back is approximately 1.88miles. The...
2 tags
Yesterday? Only the best day ever!
So I had posted yesterday that I was going to court (not really about me so no I’m not in trouble if anyone was wondering). I used my mother’s GPS that I got her for x-mas and wow I NEED one of those! Anyway, I got there and it was a bust, everyone was rude and no one would answer my questions and I ended up leaving very angry having spent the money to park/drive and leaving never...
BLARG!
A good morning, I actually fell asleep super early last night which is practically a miracle! I was planning on walking to the store to get a few things today since the weather all weekend (while I was at work) was amazing. So of course today it is much less amazing. If its warm enough I’ll still go, but I was really looking forward to some sun. Ah well. First order of business is court...
3 tags
Foiled Again!
So, my plan yesterday was all about being determined to stay on course for an entire week. All went well till my mother broughtChinese food. Noooooooooooo! My current Achilles heal! So……that didn’t go over so well.
Today then I begin again! One week on track, I’m gonna do it! Throughout the day I just keep trying to remember what it felt like when I was healthier. The...
Cut that out!
dammit self, stop being dumb!!! Woke up cranky and had Lucky Charms with Lil, but its not too late to turn this around! I’m back on the wagon today and about to hit the grocery store. This yo-yoing has got to end!! ..and that is all.
today was a sad day. I don’t know why. Off the wagon. Wish I had friends to talk to sometimes…..
February 2010
45 posts
Oh and just one little bitch..
So I bought a little single serving ice cream for Lil yesterday and she ate a good dinner so I scooped half of it out to save and give her half because I felt it was plenty for a treat. My mother walks in a says “Oh god! Your not gonna make her all self conscious about food are you?”
I honestly don’t even know how to respond to that. That may be one of the dumbest comments shes...
Clean
Ohh man, so, after my post this morning my mother had to go to the store and offered to take the Lil monster so I took the opportunity to clean as I’d intended yesterday. It takes me forever to clean but I’m also super detailed. I ripped the whole fridge apart and scrubbed it down (holy flip it was gross!) and then scrubbed down the kitchen, the kitchen floor, vacuumed, scrubbed down...
blarg!
Woke up feeling blah and behind today. Got to bed too late last night. Glad to see a lot of people woke up feeling much better than me. Weighed myself for the heck of it. Not a good motivater to see your weight up on the scale when you know you haven’t been bad. =/ Its gonna be a better day though cause I can make it better. I normally work Saturdays so I should be thankful. It’s just...
Ok, a nut is a nut
So, just talking about my nut-ness has made me want to revisit things that fuel my nut fire. So in that spirit I thought I’d share an essay that rocked my world by a really amazing guy named Wendall Berry. <3
Think Little
Please give it a quick read. Its blow your mind awesome writing.
Oh and if you like documentaries you should check out one called: King Corn
Geez, I know, here...
Well slap my ass and call my Debbie!
I didn’t binge last night. Even I am shocked. Shopping healthy is such a help I must admit. It’s much harder to give in when the bad stuff is a car ride away. Right now my biggest temptation is salsa and chips and ya know…if that’s my splurge then for now I can live with that. Sure trumps a box of mac and cheese. In the spirit of honesty I did have a few gulps of full fat...
So pizza happened……buuuuuttt……….it was the good kind. Some of my home made sauce from the other day on a whole wheat pita with cheese and a shit ton of garlic as usual (cause I loves me some garlic). It was yum and still on point. Yay for compromise. Feeling frustrated with my roommate of a mother as usual which is a major major trigger for me. I want to dig in and...
